test drive the john muse

[pranksterkind]

[in this post, you are allowed to be amnesiac and John will just make sad/confused faces at you for a bit.]

Comments

[pranksterkind]

Okay.

Compromise time.

Armageddon. No one can resist Liv Tyler.

[scratched]

I get to riff all I want and the popcorn stays in my lap so I have majority share.

[pranksterkind]

Yes to riffing, no to the popcorn. It's time you learned to share!

[scratched]

Fine--





. . . What the hell just happened here.

[pranksterkind]

What do you mean what just happened here? We compromised! And were true to ourselves.

[scratched]

I don't even remember you apart from a shitty letter and some fucking sunglasses and I just rolled over like a goddamn golden retriever.

[pranksterkind]

I guess we're just that good of friends!

[LOOK AT THIS FACE]

[scratched]

[why is this such a dilemma]

You told me my gay butt stinks what is wrong with me?

[pranksterkind]

What isn't wrong with you?

[pause]

Just kidding!

[scratched]

Weak.

Take that shit back to Weak Town where the Anti-Weak Police are putting on their Weak Riot Gear to beat the Weak Shit out of it.

[pranksterkind]

That metaphor is totally intense.

[scratched]

The insult was that intensely bad.

[pranksterkind]

Hahaha... No way, even if you're lame sometimes, you're still really cool for agreeing to watch Armageddon with me and share the popcorn!

[scratched]

If you're fishing for compliments, they aren't coming that easily.

[pranksterkind]

Nope, I am just saying what I think.

[I CALL DIBS ON MAKING THE POPCORN]

[scratched]

What the hell did my past self do to even handle you. What the fuck.

[pranksterkind]

He was... ironic about it?

[dude. What can I even say.]

[scratched]

I'd like to think I'm more subtle than that with the whole already hamfisted irony shtick. There is such a thing as taking it too far, and faking friendship for years seems like a complete and utter waste of time when I could be doing whatever it is I entertained myself with for my preteen years. Thinking about boobs or something.

[pranksterkind]

I just don't know what to say! I'm not sure you ever asked me that, and sometimes I just don't get you.

[scratched]

Well, yeah, you don't just ask someone why you're friends with them. It's like one of those things you can't do after a certain period of time - like knowing someone for six months and never learning their name, or dating someone for a year and still not knowing what they do for a living.

[pranksterkind]

That's silly. You didn't not know, you just forgot.

[scratched]

But what kind of jackass just forgets his best friend? I don't even know what the hell to say, dude. Thanks for the glasses, I guess?

[pranksterkind]

Yeah. I am kind of sad you forgot me. It's like a dick move of epic proportions. But I don't think you did it on purpose either, because you're not that sort of person.