pranksterkind | Entries tagged with write-up

"May8e we could go on a d8?" ([1] until [2])

Form:
Memories are in the form of a tiny sword the length of the user's index finger. Prick your finger to receive your memory. Unlimited uses.

What John learns:
- EVERYTHING EVER IS TERRIBLE.
- He might legitimately BSOD on this one. It's a pretty upsetting memory.
- Rose is dead, and he kissed her.
- His dad, and Rose's mom is dead.
- THIS CAN'T STAY THE SAME, BUT. UPSETTING. D8

Polite congratulations. ([1] until [2])

Form:
Cigarettes. Light it to see memory. (Smoking not required.) One use.

What John learns:
- A whole lot of nothing.
- This is basically another memory where he feels some sort of weird intrusion on his thoughts and is completely oblivious to everything around him.

SCIENCE! ([1] until [2])

Form:
Come in the form of a single teabag! The little paper tab on it has a single word, relating to your memory, but likely frustratingly unhelpful. I don't know, like "bees" or "afternoon."

You can steep it a couple times for memory tea, but it'll lose potency and gain grossness over time.

What John learns:

- Mad science is fun.
- omg what are all these cards
- FIRST TIME RUNNING INTO THE FINER MECHANICS OF HIS HOME
- sylladex
- strife specibus
- whaaaat
- ... Man I'm being kind of an idiot with my cards.

stack modus

Form:
Skills come in the form of a single long strip of worn paper with a line drawn down its center in red ink.

Tear it in two for your skill.

What this skill does:

It's like an inventory! If inventories followed especially frustrating, and useless rules. In this case, a stack modus follows the rule of first in, last out. So, basically, John can only grab the last thing he put in his inventory. And he has a limited amount of slots. I don't even have to power-limit this skill, it is JUST THAT FRUSTRATING.

It'll come with five captcha cards.

And can and will be weaponized at some point.

Ectobiolobabysitter! ([1] until [2])

Form:
Memories come in the form of a candied apple. It's already divided into six pieces for you, giving everyone six uses.

What John learns:
- Always push the buttons, especially when you don't know what it's for.
- OH THIS IS WHAT NANNA WAS TALKING ABOUT...
- Wait. Wait. If we're all time paradoxes, how did we come into existence in the first place!
- Time bullshit mixed with cloning?!
- So, Nanna is definitely his biological mother. And Jade's grandpa is his biological father.
- Gosh.
- Wait. If Dirk is Dave's bro, and he's part of this...
- DOES THAT MAKE JAKE A YOUNGER VERSION OF JADE'S GRANDPA?
- Mind. Fucking. Blown.
- But seriously, always push the buttons. What's the worst that can happen?

Descend. ([1], [2], [3])

Form:
Memories come as small, capped horns of mead, only two mouthfuls. Two uses.

What John learns:

- ... Jade died. 8(
- Where he has to go next!
- Literally, that's it. For all the flashiness of the flash, it's primarily a Dave flash. Sooooo. Yeah.

play a haunting piano refrain

Form:
Skills come in the form of a key-shaped cookie decorated in your team color.

What this skill does:

John can play the piano! That's about it. He's a man of many talents, and continues to be fucking useless for fighting.

Nanna and the prankster's gambit. ([1] until [2])

Form:
Comes in the form of a small crystal. Breathe on it to receive the memory. You instinctively know to do that-- one use.

What John learns:
- ECTOBIOLOGY IMPLIED FUCKERY?
- My dad is not my dad, and Nanna is like my mom?
- I'M LIKE HER DAD 'CAUSE I PUSHED SOME BUTTONS???
- Jade's my paradox sister?
- AAAAAUUUUUGH NANNAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
- Seriously though! I was doing hard work on my computer!!!
- I'M GOING TO GET YOU BACK, NANNA.
- Pranks are so much fun though....
- I had a necklace to summon her any time. I wonder if I can quest for that here? Hmm.

you have a fondness of really shitty movies

Form:
Skills come in the form of a bay leaf. Eat the whole thing to obtain your skill.

IF YOU FEEL THE NEED TO COOK WITH IT you're getting some mild hallucinations (1-2 hours) along with your skill when you consume whatever it is you cooked the bay leaf with.

What this skill does:

John's shitty movies info-dump! He already quested for Con Air, but now he has the memory of seeing:

Armageddon
Ghost Dad
Ghostbusters II
Little Monsters
Failure to Launch
Deep Impact

And more. I'm including this to mean every Matthew McCaunaghey, Nick Cage, and Bruce Willis movie.

Plus Adam Sandler, because that humor seems like the exact type of thing John would dig.

His expertise is late 80s (Ferris Bueller's Day Out) to the late 90s (Con Air).

Kunzite should expect him to quest for so many movies once he takes this skill.

♫ "INTERROGATE THIS MADWOMAN." ([1] until [2])

Form:
memories come in the form of condiment packets; each labeled and with a little dotted curve on the corner that says ‘TEAR ME.’ one is KETCHUP, one is MUSTARD, and one is RELISH! you have to eat the entire packet to get the memory. three uses; we don’t recommend cooking with them.

What John learns:
- All the sburb infodumping.
- Oh, the Earth is destroyed. Well, that's kind of sad.
- I made a nanna sprite? Well, I guess my nanna's kind of cool.
- She likes pranks too!
- ... COOKIES DX????

"READ YOUR BOOK. BE WARY OF THESE FOES." ([1])

Form:
Memories are in the forms of apples. Non-shareable. Well, I mean, you can share the apple, but you'll be the only one who gets the memory.

What John learns:
- So this is how Dave and I talked together.
- And he has a shitty katana... and a brother who likes puppet ventriloquist laughing
- ... So I guess that's Dirk?
- It's kind of creepy, but whatever
- This is a continuation of the last conversation, he's helping Rose. Good.
- ... what the hell is a sylladex?
- Hammers aren't shitty, at least not any shittier than your dumb katana.
- Monsters are cool, now I have another movie to hopefully discover.
- HOWIE... That's actually not very helpful for getting the movie title. >/
- This memory is short. Memories need to be longer, god.

"THE GREEN TEXT WAS ATTRACTIVE. NOW VIEW THE RED TEXT AGAIN." ([1], [2])

Form:
Memories come in the form of two palm-sized lion statues in a team colored bag. Break the statue to receive; two uses.

What John learns:
- Well, I sure did summarize everything going on in my life up to that point!
- APOCALYPSE, FIRES, METEORS, oh hey, my Dad
- I lost Jade's birthday present :(
- Dave likes these nerdy raps.
- But he's kind of obnoxious sometimes.
- Sounds about right.
- Gosh, this memory is kind of stressful.
- There's that weird thought that I don't think is my thought, but it was saying what I was gonna do anyway. Huh.

HOW CAN SHAVING CREAM BE SO FLAMMABLE ([1] until [2])

Form:
Memories come in the form of bling! Rings for the people who have hands and fingers; leg cuffs for the less humanoid folks. They're shaped like this, but made entirely of copper save for the bird's eye, which is an inset of your team stone or metal.

Wear them to receive the memory! Three uses.

What John learns:
- Shaving cream is very, very flammable.
- He has disagreements with himself over weather the people are salamanders or lizards.
- But they're salamanders.
- Windy thing! Maybe he actually did that?? Since apparently he can?
- But it sure felt like a random fortuitous gust of wind.
- The world may never know.
- Also, there's a thought voice that doesn't feel like his, but it wanted an uncarved tablet?
- IDGI.
- His suit is still the coolest damn thing ever, though.

"IS FRIENDSHIP REALLY AN EMOTION?" ([1]

Form:
Form is a water gun; spray one of your teammates to receive your memory. Can be used anywhere from one to three times depending on your self-control.

What John learns:
- Friendship is not an emotion, no matter what Karkat says. I mean, seriously.
- Hehehe, okay, pranking seems like fun.
- So he'll now start attempting it in Aather! Ohohoho!
- Time bullshit is continuing to be frustrating.
- But this conversation is before the last conversation he had with Karkat!
- Definitely playing a game.
- Weeeeeee rocket |D

Put the bunny back in the box! ([1] until [2])

Form:
Memories come in the form of a bunch of ripe cherries. Three cherries in the bunch.

What John learns:
- Well, that's where all the bunnies are from!
- Rose, you're kind of ridiculous
- Dave is also kind of ridiculous
- But seriously, Rose, you're kind of ridiculous
- That was a really sweet gift.
- I feel like putting the bunny back in the box is referencing something.
- ... Oh well, I'll find out eventually.

JOHN. RISE UP. ([1])

Form:
Memories come in the form of a palm sized teddy bear. Give it a squeeze to get your memory. Two uses! One for you and one for a friend. :)

What John learns:

- Uh. I died.
- But I got these cool pajamas for it and lots of windy thing powers?!
- Seriously, so that's where the blue pajamas from before came from.
- Are my pajamas going to be pink now? Gosh, that'll be silly.
- This is more of an intense feeling memory rather than an info heavy one.

Reunite with your loving wife and daughter. ([1] until [2])

Form:
come in the form of small hand mirrors with a dark gray casing. Viewable up to 7 times.

What John learns:
- Karkat is an angry, angry person.
- And is trolling him? Or something? He keeps referring to conversations they've had but John doesn't remember them in this memory either.
- That's kind of relieving.
- Karkat knows what he's about to do.
- THE RECKONING! WE'RE PLAYING A GAME! And that's about all he got from that.
- Why are there babies everywhere anyway?
- ... But seriously handing out bunnies is a great idea.
- CON AIR IS AWESOME
- ... But I don't remember Con Air and now I'm sad.
- is it even possible to quest for con air and something to watch it on. HE'S ABOUT TO FIND OUT.
- BABY ROSE! And... Baby Dave was there too, and maybe a baby Dirk? Huh.
- Not thinking too hard about that, yep.

Answer troll. (As Rose) ([1])

Form:
Memories come in the form of a miniature goblet, with a slightly less miniature glass vial. Fill the goblet and drink to receive your memory. (Three uses worth of poison liquid in the vial.)

What John learns:

Heeeee totally pretended to be Rose on her pesterchum handle. And he was definitely throwing out movie references left and right there, and he had a basic clue about time shenanigans, but that's about it. So basically, he's kind of annoyed that now he gets that he should really get the references that Dave keeps throwing out (HE LIKES MOVIES, WHY CAN'T HE REMEMBER THESE THINGS HE LIKES, THIS SHOULD BE EASY).

This memory is likely to make him annoyed after the game. Because it is such a reminder that he's amnesiac, and has to play games like this, and will tangentially remind him of Dave and he's mad at Dave.

"btw you will marry dave" ([1] until [2])

Form:
bag of six team colored candies, tied with a bright ribbon

What John learns:
- Exposition!
- All Beta kid names!
- TROLLS, especially Vriska and Karkat!
- I died... because Vriska tricked me, but I'm not actually mad.
- Vriska is kind of crazy though.
- The clouds on Skaia have lots of things in them?
- Karkat's shipping chart!
- I want a Dave-butler...
- I will marry Rose, but I don't know if I love her?
- I can make things fly!
- There are people worshiping my bedsheets... well, okay!
- Dammit, Rose, why are you a master of creepy magics. I wanted to surprise Jade.
- Rose's mom and my dad getting married? HRM.
- But no seriously, I wanted to know where my dad was!

"what am i about to doooooooo!" ([1] until [2])

Form:
feather in your team color! stick it behind your ear to get the memory. three uses.

What John learns:
- This is directly before his starter memory.
- Oh, Tavros wasn't lying. Her name was Vriska.
- My name is John, for sure.
- There is a big bad named Jack? And Vriska inadvertently, or purposely, made me create him?
- Time bullshit is confusing.
- Vriska likes the number 8, and I was definitely purposely indulging that!
- Karkat... who's that asshole? And why is he filling my head with confusing Vriska-thoughts?
- I have no clue what's going on but I desperately want to know what video I sent her.
- I am super easily distracted from life threatening situations.

Profile

John Egbert

December 2016

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Page Summary

Memory 17
Memory 16
Memory 15
Skill 3
Memory 14
Memory 13
Skill 2
Memory 12
Skill 1
Memory 11
Memory 10
Memory 9
Memory 8
Memory 7
Memory 6
Memory 5
Memory 4
Memory 3
Memory 2
Memory 1

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Page generated Mar. 28th, 2026 05:02 pm

mr. john, i must humbly request

that you not do that

Entries tagged with write-up

Memory 17

Memory 16

Memory 15

Skill 3

Memory 14

Memory 13

Skill 2

Memory 12

Skill 1

Memory 11

Memory 10

Memory 9

Memory 8

Memory 7

Memory 6

Memory 5

Memory 4

Memory 3

Memory 2

Memory 1